Mitt Romney : A Rom Com

As the title suggests Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney is the living embodiment of a romantic comedy. Lacking in any substance, a Mitt Romney speech is a comedy of errors that begins in a lighthearted fashion with evolving romantic themes to break up the crude humour. This unbearable display climaxes with a cringe worthy finale that makes you shuffle in your seat and your skin crawl. The name Mitt Romney alone suggests he is an alien from outer space more at home in a Douglas Adams novel hitchhiking around the galaxy.

Yet the conformin' mormon is a very typical Republican candidate. A political dinosaur with an appearance so clean cut and sharp that you would draw blood if you were to reach out. A desperation for the oval office that would push him to any length perhaps even renouncing his own faith if it got him the christian vote. No core belief system of any personal note just the party line. An elephant never forgets. The Republicans want their trunks back in The White House.

On the other side of the presidential coin you have incumbent Barack Obama. Still seen by many in America and largely the world over as an intelligent well meaning man of integrity. The kind of guy that would return a wallet he found in the booth of a restaurant with the entire sum of money enclosed untouched. Under normal circumstances integrity is a desirable quality but in America it's viewed with suspicion. Obama is being portrayed as smug and sanctimonious. They are the Lex Luthor to his Superman. They just can't believe that anyone can be that much of a good guy. But American politics always plays out as the good guy against the bad guy. Democrat vs. Republican.

Do Americans deserve Barack Obama then? The poster boy is by no means perfect and surely flawed on some level as all politicians are but his character and showmanship are long missing in Irish politics. He is a modern politician and as shallow as it might seem showmanship is one of the most important instruments in politics. It is the vehicle for your message that firmly places it in the hearts and minds of the public. Obama is the ultimate showman. A song and dance man. After all are we not sick of our politicians talking their way out of answering every question in a monotonous tone not unlike a digeridoo? We in Ireland mock Americans for stereotypical stupidity yet they possess far more intelligent and skilled orators in politics than we have had in a long time. We deserve better than the Brian Cowen's of this world.

Then again American politics did became a farce a long time ago. Their path is a dangerous landscape to navigate and a route we should learn from. These apparent opposites have one thing in common though. The candidates both possess an on camera look that suggests these puppets are uncomfortable with long the arm of their sponsors shoved up their behinds directing their each and every move. In the interest of honesty and transparency both candidates should be made to wear suits that proudly display stitched on badges with the logos of their various sponsors.

Our fascination with this political theater does not seem likely to wane any time soon. It's the hottest ticket in town. It will be as it always has been. America votes and the world watches. Where's the popcorn?